Dreamer and Realist

The 300-ring circus of my life…

Fatty McFatterson January 18, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — Ms Dreamer @ 10:19 pm

Before you get all up in arms at what I’m about to say, let me just preface it with “I’M NOT.”

Yesterday was a decent day…until I decided to weigh myself on the calibrated scales at work. See, I’d posted that I was on day 16 of no sugared sodas (today is day 17), but that I was fitting more comfortably in between the washer and the wall (our washer and dryer are in the bedroom closet, and since the dryer is a front-loader, it has to be in front of the door; the washer is tucked next to it behind the wall. to put laundry in, you have to squeeze between the front of the washer and the wall).

Well fuck all that nonsense. I’m still 249, and that just shot my day all to shit.

I had cheese for dinner. That was it. Third of a block of mild cheddar.

Whilst eating breakfast this morning (two pancake & sausage dogs), I turned to Mr Realist and commented:

“You know, I could go into the bathroom and puke this up, and it wouldn’t bother me.”

And at this point, I don’t think it would.

I hate the fucking rain and snow, and the fact that our gym in town is so god-damned expensive and whilst they have an indoor track, their “Track Pass” is only good Monday through Friday, 8-3.30. What. The. Fucking. Fuck. I fucking WORK, you fistful of assholes (I love that line from Nick & Nora, so I used it).

I think I need some professional help, LDs, for more than one reason. But I can’t afford it.

Fuck me and my fat ass.

Ms D

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9 Responses to “Fatty McFatterson”

  1. Kisha Floren Says:

    I don’t know if this will make you feel any better, but I will share anyhow in the hopes that you will not feel so alone. I work out NINETY MINUTES a day. 90. I haven’t lost any weight in two months. In fact, I gained EIGHT pounds two weeks ago. My clothes are getting a bit looser and there are muscles peeking out here and there, but seriously, one would think I would be looking like a biggest loser after picture by now. I went from lazy couch potato to 90 minutes a day. And not much in the way of results.

    Fucking sucks.

    But we’ve got to keep fighting the good fight, even if we’re not getting the results we want. Because the only time we really lose is when we give up.

    Hang in there, my friend. You are worth the fight.

    • Jesus! 90 minutes a day – where the fuck do you have time? I sent an email to Fusions about the bullshit that is the Track Pass. If they change it, bitch is going to run. What music did you wind up putting on your pod to hit it to?

      They tell you you can lose weight by cutting out sodas. Maybe after five weeks I MIGHT see a positive.

      You look fabulous in your before & after (was it 2 months?) – can’t believe the change, lovely. Maybe that’s what Mr Realist will do for me this evening – I’ll put on the tank and the shorts and take front & side pics. Post them here. It’s just miserable, and I know that the fuckysuck weather is. not. helping.

      that’s why I love you, Kisha. cause you’re so fucking fabulous.

      • Kisha Floren Says:

        I’m a stay at home mom….I’ve got nothing but time, my friend:) All that bullshit most sahm’s give you about being SO busy…well, either they’re full of it or they’re doing it wrong:)

        I’m going to start running too….I opened my big mouth and said I would run the March for Babies in April instead of walking, so now I’m screwed. Going to start training….soon. Eventually.

        I actually threw on all of the songs that people recommended and I just throw that thing on random. Skip the ones I’m not feeling that day. Keeps it fresh.

        I go back and forth (daily, sometimes hourly) between “oh my god I look so fucking great the world can’t handle me!” and “holy shit, I haven’t changed at all, I still look as fat as the day i started”. It’s the head stuff that is not working, not our dieting choices. If our heads were in the right place, we wouldn’t be in this predicament to begin with. As for the professional help, I agree-for me, though, I would be seeing a shrink, not a trainer. If I had help figuring my issues out, this wouldn’t be taking nearly as long.

        Love you bitch!!!

  2. ahelmic6 Says:

    Hey cheer up. Rome wasn’t built in a day. And losing weight isn’t going to be a quick and easy process.

    Just change up your routine a little more. Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Walk instead of drive (if it’s reasonable to do so).

    You could find a building with five floors and walk up and down the stairs for a little bit. Set a goal, like walking up and down the stairs three times each day. Or just walk around the mall for a few hours, not to shop, but to exercise.

    As I’ve said before, eat more fresh vegetables. Cut out fast food and sugary drinks entirely if you haven’t already. And keep track of those calories.

    You don’t need professional help for this, you just need determination and a goal. Start out with a small goal, like fitting into a pair of pants that are a size or two smaller than what you wear.

    🙂 you can do this.

    • Gah – you’d think after two weeks of cutting way down on the sugars, one might see even a minute improvement. fuckers.
      I’m not trying to shoot down your plans, but If there was a building around here that was more than two floors that I wouldn’t get kicked out of because I didn’t belong there, I’d do those (but I’m not supposed to because of my knee. again, fuckers)

      You, like Kisha, are awesome, Apryl. 🙂

      • ahelmic6 Says:

        You’d be surprised :). It does take time though.

        Is there anything else you could change, as far as eating habits go? My boyfriend recommended his toast diet – four pieces of toast a day some days, other days, two pieces and a meal.

        He’s silly, but the point is, watch the calories. The Itouch has some great calorie trackers on the App store. Still try the walking thing :). Even when you’re doing errands, take the longest route. Anything to get some extra walking in.

        Andy said that with his diet, and walking two miles a day, it still took him three months to see any signs of weight loss.

  3. Stephanie Says:

    I have been trying to lose weight for a couple months and I keep flucuating in a 10 pound range, can’t get below. I’m starting to add in a couple more workouts and take out some more food this week and hope something kicks in. I have heard about eating a huge amount of calories and dropping back down to a smaller number can kick start it. Who knows if that works. Good luck, saw your post in bloggers on facebok and am following now! Maybe we can support each other? Email me if you want too!

    • Totally dig the name, by the way 😉

      I know this is a lame-ass excuse, but most of it is Mr Realist (my husband). He is NOT willing supportive what-so-fucking-ever (and he could stand to lose a few pounds as well). He wants to work out in the morning, and I can’t do that. I’ve never been able to work out in the morning – all it does is make me tired for the day. Then I’m a crabbier bitch than what I normally am.

      I so want to walk, but last summer, I fucked up my left knee in softball, and I can’t walk on uneven surfaces very well – especially enough to work at the losing weight thing. I’m getting music that makes me want to kick the shit out of things on my ‘pod, and will be downloading an app for that soon.

      I am drinking more water. I think on 5 Feb, it’ll go to no soda at all (still will have to have coffee or tea to combat the caffeine withdrawls).

      Welcome to the Lair 🙂

  4. Jen Says:

    You know I love you and hate to see you upset!! I don’t have any great diet advice but just wanted to give you a shout-out & tell you that I’m proud of you for trying to make these big changes. 🙂


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